Wednesday, 16 November 2011

Cadburys Magic Elves

Cadburys Magic Elves

Everybody should know two things in life: 1. That Badger loves mashed potato and 2. Christmas officially begins at one minute past midnight on Halloween night, therefore its officially Christmas right now.

So to celebrate the start of the festive season I’m going to take some time over the next few weeks to review some of the Christmas swag hitting the shelves and everybody knows that Christmas and swag go together very well.

Here are some other pairings that go well together
Chicken and Broccoli
Frank Crank and kicking people's heads off
Mountain Dew and video games

So far so good, now by way of contrast here is a list of things that don't go together well
Michael Jackson and kids
Frank Crank and the Chinese synthetic
Popping candy and chocolate

Yes popping candy and chocolate, which is unfortunately what we have here. Cadbury’s Magic Elves are small milk chocolate bars (similar to a Taz or Freddo) with popping candy inside, dirty stinking popping candy.

Popping candy to me is nothing but a gimmick from the 70s that has been trying to crawl its way back into the mainstream ever since its glory days ended. Sure its fun once or twice on its own but its not a flavour you'll go rushing back to (unless you’re Peter Kay he loves old stuff him). Everyone laments it and wants it to return from the past but there's a reason it never made it out of the 70s, it's not nice. Plus it's a health and safety nightmare, mix a mouth full of that with a swig of coke and your head explodes, it's true it happened to my mate’s cousin.

So to actually use this in a chocolate bar just baffles me. Chocolate is meant to be a smooth experience not fizzy, so what you end up with in this bar are two polar opposite flavours and experiences bouncing of each other refusing to mix.

What's worse is this isn't even an original idea other companies have put popping candy in chocolate bars before. Don't remember them? Exactly! They were rubbish and have all disappeared without a trace.

Now these bars have been popping up (pun not intended, actually it was intended) the last few Christmases so you'd think they must be selling well but to be honest slap an elf on anything this time of year and it's going to sell especially when you factor in their bargain pricing and character driven 'collect em all' packaging.

So get them if you like perfectly decent Cadburys milk chocolate being ruined by tiny chemical explosions in your mouth, but I'm going to stick to Taz bars (caramel Freddo my arse).

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